Adult anger management is an important skill for Health Trainers.
Has someone suggested you learn how to control your anger? Do you know a client, someone at work or member of the family that needs to learn something about adult anger management? Managing anger can be a difficult for those who lack self-discipline or struggle with emotional problems. There are things people can do to manage their anger when stress levels rise and threaten to explode.
- Slow down.
Often when people get angry and without realizing it, they increase the activities which make them feel even angrier. They speak, drive, and move fast in response to the fight-or-flight response caused by a rise in adrenaline as a result of an emotional or physical trigger. In picking up the pace, some people forget to slow down and sort their issues one at a time. Instead, they jump into an argument not thinking about the consequences. The next time you get angry and ready to argue or fight, make yourself slow down, quietly and calmly assess the situation. Then you may feel calmer when it’s time to take action.
- Step back.
When you get involved in a problem, a typical reaction is to try and jump in and sort it. The best way of dealing with the issue could be to step back and think about what’s going on. Don’t rush to respond in an aggressive way as this can raise tensions or provoke an offensive response. Listen to others, let them have their say and try to understand everyone’s point of view before taking your turn to offer an opinion.
- Take a break.
There are times when stepping back may not be enough. Stress can fuel other people’s feelings to create a confusing situation. This would be the correct time to suggest that the group, or clients involved, take a break. Depending on the size of the problem and the time left for discussion, the break could last just five minutes to cool everyone down, or the meeting may need to be rescheduled, by which time everyone should be in better control of their mood and will have had time to think about the problem at hand.
- Rewind the situation.
When you start feeling uptight think back on what led you to this situation, was it something a person said? Was it a past problem triggered by a current problem? Give yourself time ask yourself why you feel upset and what you can do to sort the issue in the most effective and appropriate way. You may have to rerun the scenario several times to find out why it impacted you negatively and fueled your rage. This can help avoid a similar anger reaction in the future.
- Breathe deeply.
Stop and take several deep breaths, releasing them slowly. Sometimes a physical break can be helpful, too. Breathing deeply and slowly can lower blood pressure and focusing on your breathing moves your thoughts away from what is making you angry. If there are other people around you, do this inconspicuously or excuse yourself for a short time.
- Walk about.
Walk around the block to work off anger rather than take it out on someone, walk the dog, or make a coffee. Your anger will be reduced in response to the energy and attention required to move around. If you can get in the habit of taking 30-minute walks five times a week, your overall state of mind will improve and you could experience fewer, less intense bouts of anger. As always, check with your doctor before beginning a new level of exercise or activity.
- Talk to a friend.
You can do this by phone, letter, or email (not on an employer’s computer), or have coffee to share your emotions. If no-one is around write your negative thoughts on paper. Simply getting them out in words or writing can make you feel a whole lot better, even if the problem remains unsolved. Be ready to listen to others vent on occasion, too, which not only helps them but can put your troubles into perspective.
- Listen first, and then speak.
We have two ears and one mouth for a reason—to listen twice as much as we speak. When you begin getting angry at someone, take time to listen to what they have to say. Make sure you understand their point of view. In fact, use active listening techniques; repeat back what they say to make sure you get the point. Only then, when you have processed that information and reined in your emotions, should you offer a reply. Listening skills play a significant role in adult anger management.
That’s right—just smile. Try it now and hold it for five seconds. It’s kind of hard to stay upset, isn’t it? Smiling is one of the best and most affordable anger management tips because you can do it anytime, almost anywhere. In return, you will feel better for helping someone else feel good. The next time you get angry; try a friendly smile of understanding, appreciation, or patience as you listen to the other side of the story. Give a real smile—not a sarcastic or pretend grin. You will be surprised how easy it is to stop being mad and get into a better mood.